We have our moments in life where everything we think of or hold within ourselves comes flustering at certain sporadic moments in time or all at once; how we deal with it can be a situation of its own. 

I guess my moments come in when I over analyze a situation that is certainly occurring in my life or something from my past that still lingers there because of the ‘what if’. Sometimes I am not sure how to handle it; I do what the common population does and that is call one of my best friends and vent out any of my issues and/or frustrations that are in my head. Sometimes all we need to do is clear our minds by talking it out to the people we trust. But what happens when they don’t pick up the phone or you don’t have anyone to be there for you at that exact moment?

That’s always the tricky situation for me; because for me, I have to take a moment to myself, pause, and inhale a big fresh breath of air, in order to be okay, or if i’m feeling it then at times just let the tears of pain drip down for a bit. We need moments like that because at times it seems like we may become too preoccupied to let out the pain and/or frustrations, so if you can’t talk it out, then just let it out; it at times clears your mind, body, & soul. 

Majority of my whole life I grew up in a community dominated by men with masculine tendencies. Men are portrayed as forbidden to speak on emotions or act upon them that makes us feel vulnerable. That doesn’t mean we are always this way, as some of us do express ourselves the best way we can. Nonetheless, some of my main group of friends growing up couldn’t understand how to comprehend my true thoughts of what was going on in my head if it had to do with my own personal issues, family issues, friend issues and with my emotions when it came with women, which was always situational since I was a lover boy and my friends were savages haha.

When it came to family ties and friendships, it was always good to talk about it, because we all understood one another, and making things indifferent amongst great friends would destroy true friendships all out of a misunderstanding. What I loved is that we all shared similar family situations where we could relate towards one another, but also made it easier to bond and have each other’s back when it came to that.  

But, when it comes to women, that’s a whole different issue when you’re a romantic and your friends are not. So most of the time, the feedback from them wasn’t always useful or helpful in some cases. I won’t say all the time because even though our mentalities were different, they would still be there for me to listen and give me a shoulder to lean on. Sometimes tough love is what we need in order to continue to grow and improve on repeated mistakes that we would make in relationships. So no matter what, while being a romantic, my best friends taught me how differentiate between being taken advantage of and understanding that when one women isn’t giving you full effort or not interested, then move on, and onto the next, because your time and efforts are valued, so don’t waste it on someone that isn’t even meeting you on the same street.

In conclusion, what I’ve learned throughout the years in my life has helped me manage my thoughts and feelings when no one is there at the moment; I’m thankful for the people who have been there in my corner and continue to be. But when alone, and dealing with it, sometimes a walk around the neighbourhood with good music helps, or hell, even doing something remotely active can alleviate the stress. For me, there’s the gym and playing sports, like basketball or soccer. Before my knee surgeries last year, it was running for me, which placed my mind at ease. Others may find writing, baking, or other activities to place your mind at ease. Just know that you’re not alone, we all go through it at times, and we shall all continue to move forward though these cycles.